How does one fall in love again? It's been a long time since I've been single and now I'm back in this fast lane and I feel like I'm really struggling to keep up.
The last time i was single was back in high school and it all seemed so much easier. You met new people every second day and some people you got to see everyday. It was easy to mingle and get to know strangers. Then out of all the people you met there was always someone that you seemed to get on better with and liked that little bit more. You would talk on the bus, just the two of you side by side, you would meet up in the weekends or get something to eat after school. It didn't really feel like dating but that was exactly what was happening, you were going on mini-dates and after enough you would confess your feeling and ask them out. It felt as easy as one two three, not to mention the limited responsibilities and variables in high school relationships.
Now as I'm getting older it feels so much harder. Harder to meet new people and make friends. Their timetables, location, age all play such a big role and limits so much. When you want to see them again you actually have to make an effort to arrange a meet, not just wait for them at the bus stop. When you talk to them you need to know about something to talk about, not how gay school was and how you wish the holidays are coming up soon. Finally the biggest unknown is age, so many times I've met people and hit it off but the minuet age is mentioned the air just shifts and changes.
Its such a different playground that we roam now, and i feel like the newest kid on the block, it feels like I've once again become the bottom of the food chain and everything is new. I feel like that young boy trying to build up the courage to ask out that cootie infested girl that he like likes.
My self confidence is so strained right now, I've never feared rejection so much in my life. But what the heck, you only live life once and its too short for you to live your life in fear and regret.
...but what if she says no?